July 27th, 2018
The energy tonight is INTENSE to say the least. Full moon, lunar eclipse, and 5-6 planets retrograde. Tonight I cleansed along with the Earth. We experienced a good old thunderstorm and it was therapeutic AF. The Earth is clearing itself of all that no longer serves, and so am I. In meditation tonight I revisited some childhood wounds, going back to the womb. It was interesting as that was not my specific intention- but I always trust my highest Self to do what needs to be done for my highest good. I went back to a time when I picked up the frantic and nervous energy of my father unnecessarily worrying about money while I was still in womb. I’ve carried that worry and fear around with me for 27 years now. I am ready to let that go. I went back to a time when I felt my mother’s miscarriage was my fault. Of course, I’ve grown to understand that was not the case. But that energy has stayed with me for 21 years now. I am ready to let that go. I went back to a time that I felt so ashamed of myself for acting on impulse. To this day I’m unsure if it was a dream, or I actually kicked my grandfather in the back/chest. But the energy of that situation, real or imagined, has stayed with me for 22 years now. I am ready to let that go. All of these things happened to me over 20 years ago yet have effected my behavior every day since. No longer will I allow these stories of the past to dictate my future. On this day of release- I let go. Letting go of all that no longer serves. Releasing the anger, sadness, worry, anxiety, guilt, and shame that have been with me for so long. I no longer wish to carry these as I should have put them down years ago. Tonight I declare that I am now free.